I’ve known him since July. He’s from Connecticut but he’s been here in Toronto for about 2 and a half years. He came to this city with practically nothing and has managed to establish himself fairly well, getting his own place, working etc. He’s also been working towards getting his Canadian citizenship. He went to the US to be with his family for Thanksgiving. He planned to come home by Sunday night but got stopped at the border. He told me he was there for 8 hours talking with officials to find out that he would be not allowed back because they discovered he had been working in Canada without a work permit. This stems from working with his brother for which he had thought would be the ‘under the table’ but he ended up claiming him. He left the border sometime about 3 am and had to drive all the way back to Connecticut. While on the way back, his truck broke down on the highway. He had to call 911 because the vehicle gave up right on the ramp to a major highway. A state trooper actually had to come and plant flares because it was so dark that people may not have seen him there if they didn’t. It was his alternator. All together with tow and repair, it cost about $300. Lucky for him, the tow truck driver gave him a bit of a break or else it would’ve cost him a lot more. The border officials told him that he would not be let back into the country for a year and had 15 days to appeal! Now he’s stuck over at his mom’s.

He’s dealing with the situation pretty well, all things considered. He’s making the necessary moves to get the appeal and see what he can do to fix all this up. When he told me this morning, I was speechless and my heart sunk down to my feet. I feel so terrible for him that I feel a little queasy as I sit here and type this. Just thinking now, it’s kinda funny how he’s gone and come back a few times and nothing like this has ever happened. The most recent time was mid August.

I can’t stop thinking about him. I keep trying to think if there’s anything I can do to help but in reality, my hands are tied. Those who are close to me know who this person is and how much I feel for him.

Me: So does this mean I might lose touch with you?
Him: Not unless you want to
Me: You know I don’t want to
Him: Then you won’t. I promise

The Sweetest Thing.......

So you all know that I was down about not going to ATL with Nancy to see Darien perform right? I tried to keep busy (I even went and got my hair chopped 2- 3 inches!) and keep my mind occupied especially on Saturday night when the show was. I had plans to hang out with some friends that whole evening....

About 8 something, I'm with my boy, Kevin and my cell rings. It's Nancy. "Hey girl! Hold up!" she says. Then I hear Darien's voice. We talked for a bit but not too long cuz neither of us wanted to run up long distance minutes for Nancy. When I hung up with them, I tried to keep my composure cuz after all I was chillin' with Kev but, I couldn't stop smiling! LOL! While I was driving to hook up with my girls at a party downtown, I couldn't stop thinking about it! I felt disappointed that I wasn't there but sooo excited that I spoke to him and most of all, I was sooooo touched that Nancy called so that I could talk to him!! So thank you, thank you, thank you!

At one time or another, we both have bugged D about how he hardly ever smiles in pics! Recently, he actually vowed to me that he had been smiling more in pictures lately. When Nancy and I were planning our trip, we had a goal to get pics with him smiling...Nancy got her wish:

Ain't they cute??? Nancy also video taped the show. Here are 2 performances from that night: Don't Say Goodbye and a little different version of my favorite song, Come Around (Don't Forget To Stop The MP3 On The Right Hand Side!!):

Don't Say Goodbye






Come Around

Damn, Damn, Damn! Misunderstandings Suck Ass!!

It’s taken a week to actually write this. I’ve been thinking about this mentally since last Wednesday but the situation has finally settled in…

About 2 weeks ago, my new found friend, Nancy in South Carolina told me that Darien Brockington would be performing in Atlanta on November 18th which was about a 2 ½ hour drive for her and asked me if I could come. This wasn’t the first time I tried to travel to see him. I almost went to Detroit about a month ago but couldn’t find anyone to go with me. Nancy made it even more tempting for me by saying that she would meet me at the airport and find us a place to stay which she did. I got a little discouraged when I looked up flights to ATL…I didn’t know it would be that much! The cheapest I could find was $446 CAN. Then I remembered that I was promised a bonus at work and my boss told me that I would be getting it this month. I thought, “Hmm, it is a bonus so it’s not taking away from my budget or anything. It’s just a treat for me and besides I need to get away, even if it is for a weekend.” I then told Nancy that I would make moves to make this happen and we were getting quite excited (Perhaps that’s a lil’ of an understatement, huh, Nancy? LoL! Didn’t know how else to put it!). We even thought it would be great if I didn’t tell Darien so I could surprise him. I told Monty, his manager and he said it was a great idea. Last Thursday was when I was planning to go to a travel agent to book my flight so Wednesday night while my boss drove me half way home as usual, I reminded him about getting the cheque for me. “Sure, I’ll give you the $200 first thing tomorrow.” He said. I nearly choked and said, “200 dollars?” I was actually expecting nearly triple that. After some discussion, we realized that there was a misunderstanding. I was devastated! My boss felt bad too because he knew my plans and he kept apologizing. The rest of the ride was silent. I was totally upset but held it in as much as possible because I didn’t want him to feel worse. Before he dropped me off, he said he would give me the cheque regardless and I told him no, to save it for me as I wouldn’t be needing it right now and I’ll ask for it when I do.

Besides the initial excitement of meeting Nancy, seeing Darien and all that, I had a lot more riding on this trip. This was the first time I was doing something spur of the moment and it was actually going to work itself out…or so I thought. I was so proud of myself of thinking everything through so that there were no loop holes. Because I’ve never done this before, my parents almost brought me down about the whole thing but, not intentionally. They kept asking about why am I going, can I afford it, are you going to be safe etc…but, with every question they asked, I had a well thought out answer. The thought of even telling them my plans fell through especially for the reasons they did, churned my stomach so much because I knew it would turn into a ‘I told you so’ session. I haven’t even told them…not even ‘til this day. It was hard enough for me to tell Nancy and Monty. I couldn’t even write about this until now! Ugh, I guess I’ll figure something out eventually.

Come this Saturday, I’ll probably be in a depressive mood so those who know me, call or email me! That’ll cheer me up a bit. I think I’m going to get my hair cut or something to lighten my mood too! Doing something for myself always made me feel better.

Random Ramblings Volume 5

Why is it that I only feel the urge to write when I’m at work? For those who don’t know, I’ve been writing poetry, stories/novels off and on since grade school. Back in April when I first got my computer, I thought it would be great because I could sit in the comfort of home and just write! Now, I don’t think I’ve written anything at home except emails! Even as we speak, I’m writing this at my desk and plan to save it on a disk then cut and paste it to my blog! Has myspace and pogo.com really gotten me in this respect? I mean, I’m not an addict but I am on a lot! It’s crazy!

In keeping with the subject of computers: With all the scary things you hear about the internet with identity theft, predators looking for prey, dating website horror stories and such, I’m thankful for the internet. Thankful because we are able to connect to my cousins in the Philippines. Since I’ve gotten the computer, I’ve managed to chat with and video converse with cousins that I’ve never seen or spoken to before. I’ve met people who sometimes are better friends than some people I know that live in the same city. This paragraph is dedicated to you especially: Deedra (TX), Leo AKA Davon (VA), LRS AKA Sinro (IL), Jacquie AKA Mocca (TX), OJ (CA), Sean (CA) and Nancy (SC). Without the internet, I wouldn’t discover new music or looked into hard to find/hear artists like Little Brother, Nicolay, Liquid Spirits and United Soul to name a few. Lastly, without the internet I wouldn’t have met someone who I consider one of my favorite singers in the whole world: Darien Brockington! (I know you knew I was going to say him! LoL!) Notice I said I wouldn’t have MET him. Sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened if I did have the guts to talk to him back in February when I saw him. I probably wouldn’t have joined myspace (well, maybe eventually) which made him go from ‘some great singer I saw in concert’ to him calling me “his girl for life”!